“Power is when we have every justification to kill and we don’t.” — From the movie, Schindler’s List
There comes a time in our lives when people push us to the limits of our character and decency. They hurt us where is hurts most and they walk away without justice being served in any form or fashion. Their deplorable actions make us consider whether we should behave on the same level as they do. They make some of us consider taking actions that we would normally condemn under normal conditions.
For example:
- They steal all the life-savings from innocent people.
- They physically abuse people who are weaker and smaller than them.
- They turn friends and relatives against each other.
- They give people a bad name in the workplace in order to further their own careers.
- They frequently talk down to people for self-empowerment.
- They continuously discriminate against people who are different from them.
It is inevitable that you will run into people like this if you haven’t already. Though they comprise of a very small percentage of the population, their larger than life actions can penetrate our consciousness like a spinning bullet. You may find yourself having a hard time not thinking about the boldness and audacity of these people.
How can they be so wicked without any sign of remorse or empathy? What is going on in their minds that allow them to add so much pain and misery to the world without thinking twice about it? Do they think of their victims as human beings or do they think of them as less than that?
The more you think about them and the more you ask yourself questions about them, the angrier you will get. You can try to think logically about where their atrociousness originated or how traumatic their childhoods must have been, but the fact that they did something to hurt you may give you the natural temptation to do something equally as amoral as what they did to you—or worse in the cases of some people.
This is a trap. As soon as you decide to engage in one dishonorable act, you open the doors to similar dishonorable acts in the future. If you do something once, you’re not likely to stop there. There’s going to be a physical propensity to take that action again.
Don’t let poisonous people poison your soul
As soon as you decide to fight fire with fire so to speak, you jeopardize your character, your soul, and everything about you that makes you good. Evil has the tendency to multiply and infect peoples’ character when they let it take hold of them and it permeates to every area of their life.
I’ve seen this happen to people—many people—though they may not be aware of it. They find conversations about killing people acceptable, even amusing. They look at serious topics such as war and civilian causalities as something to joke about. They perceive people who hold different political and religious opinions as less than human and disposable because their own flexible morals allow them to think as such.
Their souls are poisoned. And I’m afraid that there’s not much that can be done to change these people because this callousness is deeply imbedded in their character. It has become a part of their nature.
Don’t let your soul be injected with the poison of revenge and hatred because it will only lead to the persona of bitterness and unfulfillment. Cherish your soul, your character, your spirit, your identity, or whatever you want to call it. It is the core of who you are.
Sometimes in real life, the bad guys win
It is a very noble act to defend yourself and others against reprehensible people. If someone breaks into your home, physically assaults a family member or friend with the intention of doing it again, or something else on that level, your best option is to prevent the situation from getting worse.
But whenever you face a situation where taking action would lead to more harm than good for yourself and everyone you care about, the best choice is to let it go and walk away. Think about the time and resources you would have to sacrifice in order to take revenge on that person. Think about the possible penalties and imprisonment you would face if you were to take matters in your own hands. Think of how much all of this would distract you from your goals and what you want to accomplish in your life.
Sometimes, you have to walk away for the wellbeing of yourself and everyone you care about. Don’t let the sense of honor or pride compel you to do something that you will regret later in life. Just let it go. Let the person who did you wrong have their small victory and just give yourself the obligation of walking away. They will likely suffer the consequences for their actions in some form later in life and even if they don’t, don’t allow yourself to worry about it. Just make the most of your life in that moment and focus on the things that are beneficial to you.
Revenge leaves you feeling empty inside
The possibility of taking revenge on someone who did you wrong may seem justifying beforehand but you will always feel unfulfilled afterwards. If you were to observe your emotions after you have done something vengeful that you didn’t have to do, you would find that you feel unsatisfied as if what you just did didn’t really make a difference at all.
That is because only love can bring you fulfillment and make you feel whole. Giving positivity creates more positivity around you while giving negativity creates a vacuum around you that must be filled with more negativity.
When someone does you wrong and taking action can only make things worse, just let it go and walk away. Contact the proper authorities if the situation calls for it but after that, it is out of your hands. Focusing on negative people will only distract you from what is most important in life.
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Do you have any addional wisdom that would be helpful for all of us? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.
{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
Tim, thank you for your inspiring post.
Focusing on negative people is exactly like focusing on negative thoughts or emotions – if possible – filter them out of your life and do your best to attract and keep only the positive around you.
It will make a world of difference.
Alex Hudish´s last blog ..Mind Control to Major Tom: You vs Your Thoughts
Thank you, Alex. Focusing on negative people like that will cause someone undue stress—might as well forget about them and focus on bettering ourselves.
Hi, Tim. Thanks for this post.
It is definitely hard to not be revengeful, especially towards people who solely have evil, malicious intentions towards other people.
If the one can produce love, the world will be more loving.
Happy Halloween!
Tristan Lee´s last blog ..Saying Hello to a Stranger: My Awkward One Second Experience
I appreciate that, Tristan. Being revengeful is just going to bring someone down to the level of those malicious people and poison their spirit. It seems much better to get those people out of our lives and focus on doing positive things instead.
Thanks for following me on twitter, I´ve enjoyed this post, it was soothing to read. I´d appreciate further thoughts on this on a context of conflict, since I find it particularly hard for souls not to be poisoned when authorities don´t respond or are part of the unjustice. I´m thinking of oppressive regimes like Iran or North Corea, or apartheid states like Israel. I have a hard time imagining how people of Gaza endure having 1600 people killed by official Israeli tanks, bombs and other sophisticated weapons, most of the innocent civilians, knowing that the crimes will never be investigated or payed for. How do you endure that and don´t become possessed by hatred? I´d appreciate any further thoughts on this, please keep inspiring us with your soothing advice.
Leila´s last blog ..12 de octubre: los indígenas continúan reclamando sus derechos
Leila, there is no doubt that it is hard to endure a situation like that and not be consumed by hatred—especially in the Middle East. Unfortunately, I saw the video of the young woman who was shot by an Iranian sniper a few months ago. Her name was Neda and the entire world watched her last painful moments because someone videotaped her death and submitted it to YouTube and other media outlets to show us exactly what’s going on over there.
Personally, I find it heart-wrenching that things like that happen all the time, even in somewhat economically progressive countries like Iran, Israel, and probably North Korea too.
I assume many people in countries like that are stuck in a crucible of sorts. It may feel safer to live under such oppressive regimes rather than taking the risk of fleeing and possibly getting caught or living in poverty in another country. And due to what is fundamentally at stake, starting a non-violent resistance like Mahatma Gandhi in countries like those is a choice that only people living in those countries should make for themselves.
That is an extremely difficult question, as you undoubtedly know, but it is definitely worth asking. That is such a tough question that I can’t think of anything else but being the change you want to see in the world. I imagine (and hope) that if I were in a situation like that, I would feel like the last option I have left is to help the people around me as much as possible—with a spirit of love and generosity.
I can’t relate 100% to how it must feel to live in a situation exactly like that, but that’s the most I can think of.
Thanks again. I agree with you, and I´ve heard from journalists who have lived in places like Gaza that solidarity happens at a level we can´t even imagine, that their hospitality and care for others is overwhelming. I guess that´s what keeps them going.
Leila´s last blog ..Facebook apoya la ocupación ilegal de Siria
This Doctor, for instance, is a great example of how to endure tragedy. Even after his loss, he kept promoting peace and he was even nominated for the Nobel Prize Award http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/2911916-palestinian-doctor-nominated-for-nobel-peace-prize
Leila´s last blog ..Facebook apoya la ocupación ilegal de Siria
Hey Tim,
This fits in very nicely with my couple of posts on forgiveness I wrote a while back. Thanks for expanding and talking about revenge. I enjoy these sorts of posts.
Gordie Rogers´s last blog ..How To Put Your Wordpress Blog On Autopilot And Spend Most Of Your Time At The Beach.
Thank you, Gordie.
Topics on forgiveness and revenge are among my favorites as well. Everyone can relate to them in some way—from what I understand, on a profoundly deep level for most people.
Hi Tim,
Great post. I loved what you wrote about how poisonous people poison our souls. That is so true.
I often think people forget that some human beings are toxic. They may not mean to be that way but because of their own unhealed pain, they inflict what they feel on others.
Sometimes, as you stated, the best thing to do is to walk away. People may not understand the action but there is no need to add any more drama to a situation that cannot be solved. If there is a solution or if it is justified, that is a different story. But sometimes people like to create drama where ever they go, sometimes it is best to just be silent.
Hi Nadia,
I appreciate your response greatly.
That reminds me of the quote “Hurt people hurt people.” People who start drama with others for no good reason are usually hurting deep down inside —probably as a result of what they focus their minds on day in and day out.
Walking away is the best answer when they will not tolerate reasonable conversation but we should probably pity them as well because they are only accumulating problems in their own lives by creating problems in others’ lives on a continual basis.
I love the quote and what a powerful movie that was. There is a line in A Course In Miracles that says “Anger is never justified.” So true.
This is a post that needs to go viral. It’s timeless.
Tess The Bold Life´s last blog ..Inner Productivity by Chris Edgar
Thank you for the taking the time to reply, Tess. I appreciate that.
Taking action out of anger is usually unjustified because people tend to do and say things they later regret in that state of mind. Calming down and then taking action with a balanced mind is often a more viable option.
Hi Tim,
Thanks for sharing this. Very well written and even better message!
God Bless!
Bill
Bill Watkins´s last blog ..Templates – Joomla has a ton of them!
Thank you, Bill. I hope it makes a positive difference.
I really like your articles, especially this one. You are very insightful and you have a wonderful outlook on life. Hopefully, your wisdom will empower the minds of other people.
Thank you, Aurelia. It can be very discouraging to be associated with people who advocate self-destructive or violent behavior. A real challenge for all of us is to not allow ourselves to succumb to their negative influence.
Thanks for stopping by.
Hey Tim,
I really liked this article.
I’d like to ask you, how do you get over your partner cheating on you with someone you know, who has to still be around in our lives. Without going crazy with anger, should you comfront this person, or still just let it go. My partner takes full blame and said it’s over, I’m trying to forgive him, which is hard enough. I don’t know what to do about her.
Azia, I have to admit that I’m no expert at giving dating advice and I don’t know the complete story of your situation. But it sounds like to me that your partner let his hormones get the best of him (which every full-functioning man can relate to) and he made a mistake that he probably deeply regrets.
He probably still loves you and you love him or else you two wouldn’t have stayed together after this scenario.
And about the girl he was with who’s still in your life, maybe it’s a good idea to ask her about her feelings of the whole situation—if she’s mature enough to approach in that way. If she’s sorry, she’ll spill the beans about how ashamed she is and how sorry she is which would make the two of you more comfortable when you have to walk past each other.
Or if that’s too much drama, you can just dump him and find someone else.
Either way, go with whatever you heart tells you.